


Fault

by wirewrappedlily



Category: Shadowhunters (TV), The Shadowhunter Chronicles - All Media Types
Genre: Author is a madwoman, BAMF Alec Lightwood, BAMF Catarina Loss, BAMF Isabelle Lightwood, BAMF Magnus Bane, Battle Boyfriends, Fix-It, M/M, accidental magic, because the breakup was some of the dumbest writing I've ever seen, don't ask just read it, no beta we die like men, take no shit ladies
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-18
Updated: 2020-04-18
Packaged: 2021-03-02 04:47:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,995
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23709391
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wirewrappedlily/pseuds/wirewrappedlily
Summary: "I love you, Magnus." Alec breathed, long fingers playing over the line of Magnus's jaw. "A forever with you won't be nearly enough time for me."
Relationships: Alec Lightwood & Isabelle Lightwood & Jace Wayland, Magnus Bane & Catarina Loss, Magnus Bane & Isabelle Lightwood, Magnus Bane/Alec Lightwood
Comments: 11
Kudos: 191





	Fault

**Author's Note:**

  * For [giidas](https://archiveofourown.org/users/giidas/gifts).



It took Catarina Loss a little more time than she expected to track Magnus down once she saw him get his powers back, and immediately portal away from his father. 

A part of her hoped that the second Asmodeus gave him his power back, Magnus would put the glaringly obvious two and two together and find Alec Lightwood himself. The poor Nephilim would probably have a coronary if he'd found out that his darling sister had immediately called her when she'd found out about the deal, which would then allow Isabelle and Catarina to tell Magnus the truth, without Alec breaking the deal at all. 

Really, Asmodeus had been said to have been better at brokering deals than that; but Catarina had to assume that with Lilith breathing down his neck, he was just as desperately scrambling for a way to sure up his hold on Edom as Alec had been desperately scrambling to make sure her darling idiot best friend would find his way back to being happy. 

Rounding the corner from the alley she had portalled into in giving chase to Magnus Bane, Catarina found herself disappointed but somehow not surprised to see that Magnus, idiot that he was when it came to his heart, had not, apparently put two and two together. 

"Do not break that lock now, Magnus. You'll just regret it in a minute." 

Magnus looked like hell. Magnus looked worse now than he had lying in the infirmary bed, barely surviving Lorenzo's magic. And she was going to have words with the second-rate High Warlock of Brooklyn about keeping Magnus's home when he _knew_ , because he had to have known, that his power would not take hold in Magnus. 

"Now, I know you're throwing a pity party for yourself at the moment, dear, but hear me out. Why did your father give you your magic back, so soon after your Shadowhunter broke your heart?" 

Magnus's face twisted, and Catarina couldn't help but feel a deep agreement with Madzie when her little one complained about the stupidity of boys. "What are you talking--Why are you here?" 

"Because Isabelle Lightwood is a good, meddlesome little sister, and because you're hip-deep in the self-loathing part of your breakups and I do not have the patience or the vodka laid-in to deal with that when you really ought to be realizing that your boy summoned your father in order to make things right." 

Magnus's eyes widened and his breath caught, a slight stumble coming hand-in-hand with the realization of what Catarina meant. "He--He broke up with me to get my magic back?" 

"Yes. Now, while I had hoped you'd show up on his doorstep immediately and cuff him over the back of the head for this, Isabelle and I have a plan, because we really need to make sure players like Lilith and your father are off the proverbial board." Magnus's eyes were ducked, refusing to meet hers, and Catarina grit back the urge to tell him off for it; instead, pressed on. "Asmodeus is not omniscient, and he's not omnipotent. You and Alec can remain together through this, you're just going to have to go about it the smart way." 

Catarina reached into Magnus's pocket and drew out his cellphone, offering it to him expectantly. "My first recommendation is to maybe yell at him a little bit for being self-sacrificing and an idiot, because Azael's nipples, Magnus, I plan on yelling at you quite a bit once this is all through." Magnus's next inhalation was shaking, a slight tremor in his fingers as he reached hesitantly to take the phone from her hand, and when he blinked, he could not keep a tear from falling; whether from the echoing pain, or from relief that the pain was not going to remain, Catarina couldn't tell. "Go to my place. Wait for word: Isabelle's going to let you know once she's done telling Alec off. I have some more mess to be cleaning up, and Madzie has been asking for you, so you can damn well make her a snack and let me take care of things." 

"Cata--" 

"No, Magnus. No. You're going to let me take care of this; of all of this, because I am your best friend and because you would do the same for me--have _done_ the same for me, when I needed you." 

Catarina waved open a portal to her place, and glared at Magnus until he stepped through it, sighing to herself as she cast her eyes back to the lock Magnus had had in his hand when she'd stopped him. 

The Indonesian for 'I love you' nearly made Catarina's heart break, and remembering how Magnus had _gushed_ about how sweet and adorable Alec had been for this had her smiling to herself. The magic to protect the lock from rust and weather was there, but Catarina pushed it further, letting herself dawdle a little from what she'd go on to fix next. The lock glowed slightly for a moment, as she made damn sure that there was nothing, not magic or damage, would separate the lock from its place in commemorating Magnus's great love story. 

It was what this kind of love story deserved, after all. 

~

Alec impacted with the floor hard, Isabelle's left knee pressing into the dead centre between his shoulderblades as she torqued his arm nearly to dislocating. 

"Listen to me, hermano. You are a self-sacrificing idiot, and you and I are going to have a very long conversation about quitting that shit, but Catarina and I have a plan." 

Alec grunted, and somehow, Isabelle managed to put even _more_ weight on her knee. 

"Izzy, don't actually break him?" Jace requested from the other side of the training room, sitting in Alec's line of sight, casual as you please, while his parabatai was beginning to wonder if an iratze would work on a broken spine. 

"You have a better idea for making sure he actually sits still and listens?" Isabelle challenged, not even sounding all that winded for having solidly wiped the floor with her older brother. 

Jace's face became a moue of speculation, his head tipping to the side before he finally admitted, "No. No, I don't." 

Isabelle snorted a laugh, and Alec growled, "I'm glad you two are having a laugh--" 

"Shut up, this is not the time for the Big Voice. This is the time for Alexander Lightwood to shut the fuck up and let his darling siblings take care of him for once." 

"Take care of me for _what_?" Alec hissed, trying and immediately failing to get any kind of leverage to knock Isabelle off without fully dislocating his arm. 

"You know what." Jace growled right back, folding his arms across his chest and trying very hard to emulate the glare that was more at home on Alec's face than it was his own. 

"He--He told me he would never be happy again. What was I supposed to do? Sit there, knowing that he's miserable; knowing that I could stop it?" 

"Did you think, even for a moment, that you have a full contact list of people you could have called on to come and help you cheer him up while we looked for another way?" Isabelle snarled, and Alec had a whole five milliseconds of reprieve from the pressure before he once more collided with the ground, this time on his back, and Isabelle's knee in his spine was replaced with her sitting on his chest, and a moment later with Jace sitting on his legs. 

"What other way? Where would you have had me start, but to go to Asmodeus?" Alec managed to demand, even though Isabelle had chosen her position to carefully allow him barely enough oxygen to be getting on with. His arms were technically free, but the one she had had was numb enough that he knew better than to try to move it yet. 

"Never mind that now." Isabelle sighed, "You've done the stupid thing, and now Catarina and I are fixing it." 

Jace made a small noise of protest, and Isabelle rolled her eyes. 

"You do not get to be added to this list when you did not come up with nor have a major role in this plan." Isabelle sniped, and between the bickering and the way they had him pinned, Alec was suddenly back to being a teenager with his siblings; the two of them teaming up to get him to take a minute out of his own head. 

"What plan?" Alec knew his voice dripped with a resignation he really did not want to be feeling, and Isabelle beamed at him, knowing from that alone that she had won. 

"You and Magnus are going to only pretend you're broken up." Isabelle replied sweetly, "While Magnus finds out just what his father has in store for him with his powers back, and you help me figure out what we're going to do to take out Lilith and Asmodeus using the information he gathers." 

Alec blinked at Isabelle, just waiting. 

"Catarina is explaining to Magnus what's going on--which does not negate the deal, so Magnus will get to keep his powers. Once we're through here, you're going to get in touch with Magnus and grovel as he sees fit, because this was _dumb_ , big brother. Dumb on a level you have not been dumb since you nearly married Lydia." Isabelle shook her head, examining her nails idly. "And when it's all done, you're going to plan your own damn wedding, and live happily ever after, or Catarina and I will become the unholy alliance you know damn well we could be." 

"If Catarina is telling Magnus about this, why the hell do you think he's going to ever forgive me--" 

Once again, Isabelle somehow managed to increase her weight, and Alec let out a small wheeze that was all he could manage in protest. 

"First of all, you are an idiot. Secondly, this is why I told you that you're going to have to grovel." As if putting punctuation on that assertion, Alec's phone went off in Jace's hand. 

"Ooh, Magnus is coming here! Catarina wants to know if you're done with him yet." Jace reported after a moment. "Also, Alec, pick another passcode." 

Alec was more than a little light-headed, but he managed to flip Jace off with the hand that actually had enough feeling to do so. 

"Max's birthday?" Isabelle confirmed. 

"Of course." Jace sighed. "I'm giving Catarina the go-ahead, by the way." 

"I'm not letting him up until we all agree we are on the same page. Magnus and Catarina, too." 

Alec pushed out his air in a whine, and Jace started laughing openly at him. 

"Lightwoods?" Catarina called from the doorway to the training room. Magnus was dawdling as much as she would allow him, but when she burst out laughing at the tableau of sibling-hood, Magnus was immediately at her elbow. 

"Hello!" Isabelle's beaming smile could be heard in her voice as she waved Catarina and Magnus closer. "Magnus, I am very sorry my brother is a self-sacrificing idiot." Magnus's breath stuttered, as did his forward momentum. From his position, well on his way to passing out on the floor, Alec could see just how terrible Magnus looked; and for a moment, the question was not whether Magnus would forgive him, but more how he could ever dare to forgive himself. 

"You...You made a deal with Asmodeus?" Magnus asked Alec, though he still wouldn't quite look at him. 

Isabelle slid off his chest and Alec took a full breath, nearly choking on it. 

"He did." Isabelle answered for him, "We...Catarina and I figure that if he were to tell you himself, it would negate the deal, even with you already knowing about it." Magnus looked from Isabelle to Catarina, and nodded, dropping his eyes so that he was back to not-quite-looking at Alec. 

"I'm sorry." Alec managed, and Jace squeezed his ankle in encouragement. The grief and self-loathing that had to be echoing through the parabatai bond was likely enough to strangle Jace, and Alec found that his normally iron-strong control could not stand against it. "I...I had to." 

Magnus's face twisted, and Jace's weight left Alec's legs at Isabelle's urging, Catarina and his siblings heading for the door, the assertion that Isabelle wanted them all on the same page be damned. 

"It's not...I love you, no matter what. All I want--All I want is for you to be happy." Alec watched as self-recrimination stole over Magnus's features, and he managed to pull himself into sitting up, the rush of blood and oxygen enough to have him blinking stars out of his vision. "If I thought for a moment, that there was any other way for you to be happy, than to have your powers again--to be _whole_ again, I never could have--" 

"Stop." Magnus's voice was rough and small, and the atmosphere in the room was sparking with tension and pain and anger that was all too well-deserved. "I...I understand."

"No, you don't. There's no way for me to fully explain it without...and I can't risk losing you because I've lost you your powers. Again." Magnus moved then, closing the distance until he sank to the floor to sit across from Alec. 

"I...I don't know what to feel right now." Magnus admitted at last, closing his eyes. 

Everything in Alec screamed to reach out and catch Magnus's fingers in his own, but the part of him that hated himself for putting the expression of desolation on Magnus's face kept him half in hope that Magnus wouldn't accept his touch. It was the least he deserved, after all. "I...You have to hate me. I lost you your powers in the firs--" 

" _No_." Magnus ground out, his voice more like broken glass than it had been when he'd told Alec the story of his step-father's death. There were tears a breath from falling from Magnus's lashes, and Alec couldn't stop himself from reaching out for Magnus's hand for one second longer. "You did not lose me my powers, Alexander. I chose to let them go. I...I did it for you," he allowed, and his fingers tangled with Alec's; warm and sure while Alec could not escape the chill that had stolen over him, the second he had left Magnus standing in the bookshop, "but it was my choice. Much like giving me my powers back was a choice you made, to sacrifice us for me." Magnus wrapped both hands around Alec's, bleeding warmth into him, and finally Magnus looked at him, his glamour dropped and every other mask he'd ever had in place laid in pieces between them. "I am so mad at you, Alec...but I don't hate you. I don't think I ever could." 

The click in Magnus's voice on his name had Alec half falling forward, trying to wrap Magnus into his arms. "I'm sorry, Magnus. I love you--I love you so much more than I can even say--" 

"Shh," Magnus breathed, only trembling slightly as he let himself be held by Alexander Lightwood; a singular pleasure neither of them thought they'd have again, just a few hours ago. "I love you, too." 

"Can we come back in and talk about what we actually plan on doing, or are we going to have to arrange that for tomorrow, and let you two figure out how the fuck you're going to make it seem like you're still broken up?" Jace yelled, and Alec couldn't help but snort into laughter against Magnus's shoulder as the sound of both Isabelle and Catarina smacking him and chastising him immediately followed. 

"I don't want to be apart from you for a second," Magnus breathed the admittance, and Alec squeezed him tighter. 

"I don't want this pain I've put us through to come to nothing, though, Magnus." Alec brought himself to murmur, "I can't watch you lose your powers again, not because of me--" 

Magnus turned his head, guiding Alec's face up and towards him so that he could steal the words from Alec's lips, kissing him until Alec's hands tried to slide under his jacket. Pulling out of the kiss, Magnus couldn't resist pressing two more tiny pecks to Alec's pout before he pulled away fully, "See, this is how we get." 

Alec let out a grumble, but he smiled, and when he opened his eyes to look at Magnus properly, a small, painful twist of relief filled his chest to see Magnus smiling; the look of haunted pain all-but gone. 

"Come in." Magnus called, shifting to settle beside Alec instead of across from him, the line of them pressed together easily. "Just what the hell did you do to your brother?" Magnus demanded of Isabelle, though there was no heat behind it. 

"I beat some sense into him, then sat on him so he couldn't escape." Isabelle replied, as if it were the most sensible thing in the world. Alec hated to admit it, but it probably was. 

"He can lift more than you weigh." Magnus pointed out. 

"Not if I deprive one of his arms of blood for long enough that he can't use it." Isabelle shrugged. 

Magnus hissed, reaching over to Alec's nearest arm, apparently uncaring if that was the right one. The wash of magic that Magnus pushed through Alec was nearly enough to bring tears to Alec's eyes. The familiar feel of the magic pushing through him, healing him, was something that Alec _needed_ , after what he'd put them through to get that magic back. 

"So, what is the plan?" Jace asked, sitting on Alec's other side with only a mild look of confusion as to why they were sitting on the floor still. 

"Well, for starters, I've gotten your apartment back, Magnus." Catarina produced the key, handing it over to Alec when Magnus seemed frozen in shock. "Lorenzo...hadn't quite realized the reach of your friends' displeasure at having cheated you out of your home." 

Magnus was imitating a caught fish, and Alec caught sight of Izzy smirking to herself before she hid it behind her curtain of hair. 

"We need to figure out why your father was willing to make a deal with a Nephilim to get your powers back. I have my suspicions that it's Lilith, breathing down his neck--but the orchestration of having you heartbroken..." Catarina trailed off, and shared a heavy look with Alec and Magnus both. 

"And I just played into his hands..." Alec sighed, the self-loathing evident just from his tone. 

"I gave him the opening in the first place. Showed my hand as to the lengths I am willing to go to for you. This is not your fault." Magnus argued quietly. 

"Pause," Isabelle half-shouted over her brother's response to that, hands flying up as if staying a wild bull, "you two can argue this later. Right now, we have to put the pieces in place and get Magnus back into play with Asmodeus. If we want to find a way to take out both Asmodeus for threatening your happiness, and Lilith for threatening the _world_ , we need to work smarter." 

"It's my intention," Catarina told them when both men had subsided like well-scolded schoolchildren, "that you rendezvous, when you choose to rendezvous, at a neutral location. Neither of you are stellar actors when it comes to things like this, but we have to keep under wraps as much of this as possible." 

"That's why you had me wear a glamour when we got here." Magnus confirmed, nodding. 

"If you two can maintain the act, we think that if we play this correctly, we can take out both Lilith and Asmodeus. Magnus, I'd be willing to bet that he needs you to try to take her down--" 

"Magnus is not going to Edom alone to fight _Lilith_ , Isabelle." Alec spoke up, voice brooking absolutely no argument. 

"And Nephilim can't survive being in Edom." Catarina's voice walked the line between agreement and a hint towards a further plan. "But we're going to leave snag to me." 

"If I go to Edom with Asmodeus, I won't be coming back without having killed him. And while I think I could on my own here, trying to do so in Edom, in the seat of his power, would be foolish." Magnus insisted. "I'd rather lose my power for good, than go to Edom with him." 

Alec's hand in his tightened, his shoulders tense. "What are you thinking?" Alec asked Catarina directly. 

"You're angelic," Catarina sighed, "the angelic blood is what would kill you in Edom. If we can find a way to share Downworlder blood within you, even temporarily, we could potentially get you into Edom without killing you. I don't know of a way for it to be done, but I will find one." 

Alec knew that Magnus had every faith in Catarina; that in doing what she had done for them already, she deserved nothing less than that faith, but he couldn't help the sneaking doubt that they, as a team, would not come to be much help in the fight.

"While Catarina and I look at ways we can do this, Magnus, we need you to stall for as much time as you can get us, while maintaining the idea that there..." 

"Isn't anything left for me here." Magnus supplied when Isabelle trailed off. 

"That's bullshit." Jace snorted, and when the others looked at him, his eyebrows skyrocketed. "You have Catarina and Madzie; every Downworlder that you've ever helped views you like their dad. And I don't know if, in the hypothetical, you'd want us--" Jace gestured from himself to Isabelle, "but you'd have us, even if the breakup was real. We wouldn't suddenly love you any less. If anything, I'd probably be beating on Alec harder than Isabelle did." 

Magnus's hand tightened in Alec's, the look of thanks on his features open and soft in a way he rarely allowed himself unless the people with him were trusted beyond the pale. And the people with him truly were. 

"All that aside," Catarina's smile at Jace was warmer than any of them would have ever expected, "If we want to win this particular battle, we need to be ready, and that means playing along, at least a little, to Asmodeus's game." 

Magnus jerked a nod, and Isabelle reached for the hand Alec wasn't holding, giving it a tight squeeze. Swallowing, Magnus turned to look at Catarina, "But it brings up another point. You think that Asmodeus wanted to get me vulnerable enough to be compliant. If that's the case, then anyone else I'm overtly close to may be in danger. Asmodeus doesn't understand things like friendship and family, but if he actually _sees_ that I have anything keeping me here, he will probably try to destroy that tie." 

Catarina frowned, "Damn." 

"So we try to avoid contacting you as much as we can," Jace reasoned, "and stick together otherwise. Safety in numbers." 

Alec's hand tightened on Magnus's, "I...How long do you think we'll have before Asmodeus starts hunting for you in earnest?" 

"I'd give it about a day." Magnus replied. 

"We need...we need to have that talk." Alec murmured. 

"We're going to go start on looking for ways to make sure that Magnus won't be alone in this fight." Isabelle told her brother, "I'll clear the way to your room, Alec, make sure no one will see you two together." 

"Thank you." Magnus managed. 

Once the door to Alec's room was shut behind them, Alec felt his self-loathing and guilt rise again, the ghost of Magnus's grief when he'd first walked into the training room something Alec knew he would carry with him forever; a spectre that would steal the breath from his lungs any time he was in any way unwary of his thoughts. 

Magnus looked up at him, the set of his features grim, "I don't know who to be more furious at, Alexander. You, for thinking that anything would be worth causing either of us this much pain; or me, for giving you the idea that I would recover from losing you. Because that's what you thought, isn't it? That I would have my magic back, and get over you, and be...be happy." 

Alec swallowed, hoping that he wasn't going to cry, if only because he didn't want Magnus to comfort him; wasn't worth Magnus's time and energy to comfort, not for this. "Not to reopen even older wounds, but you're going to have to be able to recover from losing me, Magnus. You _have to_." 

Magnus sighed softly, and the hesitation as he reached for Alec's hand again was another knife through Alec's very soul, "I told you once that I cut myself off from feeling anything for anyone for centuries, Alexander, because I didn't want to put myself through the pain. Do you honestly think for a moment that the love that knocked down those walls, without even really trying, would be something I could ever recover from?" Alec flinched back, and Magnus drew forward, reaching up to cup his hand over Alec's cheek. "When it happens, there will be no coming back from it for me, Alec. You've changed me irrevocably." 

The sound of pain that Alec made had Magnus pulling him in tightly, the desperate cling of them together feeling as though Alec were dragging himself over broken glass, because he knew that Magnus would _have_ to recover from him--didn't have a choice. And for all Alec's desperate hunting for a way to change that, before Magnus had given his powers up, he had gotten no closer to an answer. Dragging in a deep breath, Alec forced himself away from the grief of the future, because there was more than enough grief to be getting on with now. "I love you--I love you so much, Magnus, and I'll _never stop_. Not having your magic was killing you. And I couldn't watch...I couldn't watch you die. I couldn't be the reason--" 

Magnus let out the breath of a hush to stop him, moving to lean their foreheads together in an echo to the desperate clinging he'd done in the bookshop, "I love you, too, Alexander. Did I give up my powers for you? Yes. But it was my choice to make." Magnus pulled back enough to look Alec in the eye, the quiet introspection normally something Alec would want to coax Magnus out of, lest the memories Magnus carried overwhelm him. "I would do it again. Make that choice. It...It was killing me, Alexander, you're right. But I made the right choice. I just didn't make it in the right way. I was thinking of you--what losing Jace would do to you. I couldn't stop thinking of you for long enough to even partway prepare myself for what losing my powers would do to me." Magnus brushed his fingers over Alec's cheek, "I can't tell you that it wouldn't have hurt if I had taken the time to think, Alec, but if I had actually prepared for it, I don't think I would have been quite as bad-off as I was." 

"I'm sorry," Alec whispered, perilously close to tears. 

"I _understand_." Magnus replied, sounding as if the truth of that statement was a surprise in itself. "I couldn't, at first. But now that I see you? Now that I _know_? I think I can see your reasoning." Magnus took Alec's chin in his fingers, tilting his head so that their gazes locked, "I need you to listen to me: There is _nothing_ worth this pain you're carrying. Not my magic, not me. You saved my life with this, Alexander, but I know you. And you have to listen and believe me when I tell you to put this pain down; to stop carrying it." 

"How can I?" Alec breathed, closing his eyes, "I didn't mean it, Magnus, but I said the one thing you would believe enough to let me go--I knew it and I used it, and I don't know how you don't hate me for that; let alone how I'm supposed to not hate myself." 

Magnus pressed his lips to Alec's, the simplest, softest kiss. "I don't hate you, because you blew up the very ground you stood on to make things right for me." Magnus stroked along Alec's cheekbone, "I can't help but see it a little bit as a love letter. And as proof of how well I do know you. You're really not that selfish. You're that _selfless_." 

Alec choked on a laugh, wrapping Magnus in his arms all the tighter. 

"I love you, and you love me. So, let's go to bed, Alexander." Magnus teased his fingers over the corner of Alec's mouth, "I'd really like to wrap you in my arms for the next few hours." 

Alec was shaking as he nodded, the relief from the grief almost more painful than the grief had been in the first place. Magnus snapped his fingers, and Alec shivered into him, the wash of Magnus's magic getting them cleaned up and down to their underwear indescribably welcome. 

Magnus pulled Alec into him as soon as they laid on the bed, curving around him and holding him tight. Alec sucked in a breath as Magnus's hand wove through his hair, and the scent of sandalwood was enough that a tear finally slid free. "I assume Asmodeus is the one that told you that I was dying without my powers?" 

Alec licked his lips, opening his eyes to look at Magnus, the softness of his features telling Alec all he needed to know about what being in Magnus's arms was giving to Magnus. He didn't know what rules there would really be, with Magnus knowing of the deal; but he had to assume that he could skirt the edges of it enough for this, even if it felt like a risk he wouldn't survive the consequences of, "Break your heart, to save your life." The urge to look away from Magnus was strong enough that Alec knew he couldn't let himself, and he forced himself further, "I love you, powers or no, Magnus. But...I knew how miserable you were. How much you'd given up, to keep me whole. That spark in you _won't_ go out, not ever, that was never a possibility with someone like you. But I couldn't live with myself, knowing that you'd given up the life you love for me, and that the pain you were in was enough to crush you." 

Magnus laid his hand over the deflect rune, his gaze feeling like a touch in itself. "I'm sorry. That night--I'm sorry." 

"No. I...I needed you to tell me. To let me see it, Magnus." 

"I should have been letting you see it before it got to that point, though, shouldn't I?" 

Alec offered a tiny smile, "That may have helped. Preparing me for what you were really feeling. Like you wish you could have prepared yourself for giving up your magic." 

"You may not have gone for the nuclear option if I'd clued you in to my bad days before I blew up at you on my worst." Magnus agreed softly. "I didn't want to burden you..." 

"You're not and would never be a burden to me, Magnus." Alec told him steadily, "You saved me. You're the reason I had any chance at all at being happy. It wouldn't be a burden to me, to get to try to help you find your way to happiness, too. It'd be a gift." 

Magnus's breath caught, urging Alec into a kiss. Alec couldn't help the whine that snuck from his throat as Magnus licked into his mouth, the relief of kissing Magnus crushing the breath from Alec's lungs all over again. Fingers skating over Alec's throat, Magnus gave himself over to the kiss the same way he had the first time they'd kissed; as if the second Alec's lips touched his, all reason was lost and Magnus was not about to fight to get any back. 

"Promise me something?" Magnus asked, breathless from their kiss and still a breath away from kissing Alec all over again. 

"Anything." Alec told him easily: knowing that he would follow Magnus into Edom when it came to it, because there was nothing, anymore, that he wouldn't give. The knowledge of what losing Magnus would do to him was and always would be too stark to allow even the smallest risk of it happening again. 

"We're going to be okay. No matter what we have to do to get Asmodeus off our backs; no matter what comes next in the unending stream of terrible things that seem to befall us. We're going to be okay." 

Alec's breath caught, and he went minutely tense, which was enough for Magnus to crumple in on himself slightly. Alec kissed him in an attempt to drag him out of it, smiling as much as he could with the anxiety building in his chest. "Where did you disappear my clothes to?" Alec asked, swallowing down his nerves. "There's something in the pocket of my jacket...that I should really give to you." 

It had been something of a sign, Alec reflected, that Isabelle had taken him by the ear into the training room, before he'd been able to hand over the ring to his mother. Alec reluctantly climbed out of bed, and Magnus's confusion was almost priceless, because for as much as he'd wanted to keep it a surprise, Alec had very little stock in his own acting abilities. 

Alec retrieved the ring from his jacket, moving back to the bed and kneeling beside Magnus, who looked as if he'd been hit about the face and neck with a dead fish. "I had a whole speech prepared. Made Jace listen to it, even. But I want you to know right now, that if I have anything to say about it, you're it for me and I will not stop fighting for you. Magnus Bane, will you marry me?" 

Magnus reared up, and Alec laughed as the momentum carried him down, would have toppled them off the bed if Alec was not as well-trained a Shadowhunter as he was. Their kiss was sloppy with their smiles and laughter, but it was so good that Alec almost forgot he was holding the ring. 

When they slid apart, the joy on Magnus's face eased the knot still sitting in Alec's chest. "Well?" Alec asked, chuckling. 

"On one condition." Magnus capitulated, and Alec narrowed his eyes, the tease merciless between them. "I want to hear that speech eventually." 

Alec huffed, and Magnus reached out, the touch of his fingers to the ring pulling another one into existence with a joyous flicker of magic. Magnus reached for Alec's hand first, and as he slipped the ring into place, Alec had never felt more as if he was the luckiest person to exist. "Yes, Magnus. Whatever else happens. I promise that you and I are going to be okay." 

~

When the situation with Asmodeus came to a head, it was of little consequence that Alec had been noticing, more and more, that there was something strange going on around him. 

There had always been a lingering sensation of Magnus's magic around him: When he was in the loft, his glass of water never emptied; when he was training or in a fight, his quiver never ran out. The ability to call his bow into his hands at will had been something that had, at first, taken Alec aback, but he'd never acknowledged it, and neither would Isabelle or Jace, though they both undoubtedly noticed. 

Now, though, it wasn't just in the loft that his water glass would refill itself. He would think to go looking for something to have it appear before him. And in his worst moments, when Alec was aching to just catch a break in one thing, any one thing--sparks would tingle along his fingertips. 

He didn't mention it to Catarina or Isabelle; didn't have any chance to mention it to Magnus in the desperate moments they managed to steal in order to trade information and, if they were lucky, a kiss. 

But it was undeniable: Alec knew that there was something...off about himself. 

It had been necessary for the ruse, for Magnus not to wear the Lightwood ring, but Alec had been more than happy to wear his own, and when things with Asmodeus came finally to bear, he could only put it down to the ring that he got swept up, too. 

Edom was dust and sulphur; the choking pain of it stirring up a sandstorm of magic around Alec until he realized that if he pushed through the pain, he could breathe. The ring on his finger was cool in the oppressive heat, and Alec hoped that Simon and Isabelle, who had been standing in his office with him before he'd suddenly been standing in Edom, would be able to rally the troops in whatever way they could manage. 

The tug under his ribs was beyond comprehension for Alec; because with that alone, Alec knew that Magnus was there, and where to go to get to him. 

In the familiar flurry of blue sparks, Alec had summoned his bow and quiver, the dagger at his hip faithfully lighting up when he touched it to make sure that the adamas would work even in Edom; that whatever was protecting him--No, Alec knew what was protecting him, he just didn't know _how_ Magnus's magic was doing what it was doing--would not affect or be affected by the angelic influence. 

Moving as silently as he could with the crunch of the sand and rock beneath his boots, Alec crested a rise, and caught sight of Magnus and Asmodeus, staring into the distance towards a growing darkness in the red-tinged half-light. 

The realization that that darkness was an army of demons was staggering, but the wraithlike form high above them was the focus of both Asmodeus and Magnus. 

Alec nocked four arrows, sucking in a slow breath and taking aim at the demons drawing closest. He felt, rather than heard or saw, Simon, Clary, Jace, Meliorn, Isabelle, and Lorenzo step through a portal behind him. 

It was an act of faith, not to turn and look at his siblings to make sure they weren't dying because of the blood in their veins. But it wasn't so great an act of faith, really. Alec had his sights on the immediate threat to Magnus, and found that even for how much he loved Isabelle and Jace, he wasn't about to break his own concentration when it was a question of protecting the love of his life. 

"Catarina sends her regards, and would like to know how the hell you're here without Clary's latest rune." Jace told him sotto voce, and Alec let himself smile slightly, the magic easy to call on to set his arrows alight. 

He saw Asmodeus and Magnus engage with the wraith he assumed to be Lilith before he allowed himself to loose his arrows; hoping that Asmodeus wasn't so foolhardy as to pick a fight with Magnus about their presence here when Lilith was the bigger concern. 

There was a shout of rage from Asmodeus, but Alec didn't pause, cutting down another four of the oncoming demons and then another before something had him pull his gaze back to Magnus and Asmodeus. 

For as much as Alec had never seen Asmodeus using his magic, Alec had to assume that he was holding off now; letting Magnus drain himself against the wraith instead of helping him to take her down. Alec nocked another arrow, his anger at Asmodeus flaring brightly enough that the ring of magic around that arrow was almost blinding in the dull half-light of the dimension; a sun, brought into Hell. 

"Go!" Isabelle ordered, gesturing for Alec to draw closer to Magnus and Asmodeus as the wraith screamed, the arrow ringed with Magnus's magic having ripped a hole larger than a man's head through the wing that had been thrown forward to protect Lilith's throat. 

Alec moved easily, trusting his siblings, their friends, and even Lorenzo to have his back as he ran for Magnus. 

The drain of Magnus's magic was visible as Alec drew closer to them, and it was barely the work of a thought for Alec to hit Asmodeus with a wave of the power still roiling within him, knocking him aside easily. "Alexander!" 

"Magnus, take my strength. Take what you need. I have your back." Alec put his hand into Magnus's, tearing his eyes away from his lover's to focus once more on Lilith and her jagged trajectory towards them. 

Alec remembered what it had been like, that night he'd given his strength to help heal Luke, and when Magnus pulled a tiny trickle from their joined hands, Alec huffed, and forced the connection wider, open fully, until his hand in Magnus's was the only thing that kept Magnus standing under the onslaught of power shared between them. 

Where that night, it had ached as if he'd been running for his life for days, this time the flow of power felt less like an undertow and more like riding a current. It was more powerful, Alec could tell that much, but at the same time, it was not the same drag that it had been. Magnus summoned power to his palm, bright and burning white, and concentrated that power onto Lilith, the impact of Magnus's attack against the hissing and writhing black flame of her thrown-up defense nearly toppling them both this time. 

Asmodeus's movement caught in the corner of Alec's eye just in time for Alec to accidentally stumble his way into throwing a shield up around himself and Magnus, the lash of Asmodeus's rage-fueled magic feeling like the impact of a mite on a windscreen. "You broke the deal!" 

"No," Isabelle responded, the blurring speed of her suddenly standing between them raising concerns in the back of Alec's mind, because he had at one point entertained the idea of getting Simon to Turn him if it came to it, "Magnus's _family_ loves him a little too much to let a trifle like you get in the way of him being happy!" 

The lash of her whip caught Asmodeus in the face, and Alec felt Magnus begin to laugh, even under the weight of the crackle and spark of magic dripping from the beam of magic he'd managed to keep up. 

Alec leaned over, pressing a kiss to his cheek, and when he let go of Magnus's hand, he was relieved to feel that the bond between them didn't stutter with lack of contact. Lilith's defense was crumpling, the injury to her wing bringing her in a stuttering and jagged path to the ground, but Alec was _done_ to his core with all of it. He drew one arrow, the crackle of Magnus's power swelling around him, and released with his exhale. 

The arrow hit home, and Magnus staggered slightly as the power he'd been concentrating on Lilith ripped through her in a cloud of blood and ichor. Alec turned, watching as Lorenzo and Clary battered Asmodeus with fireballs, and Isabelle lashed him with her whip, the three of them constantly in motion. 

"What the hell happened?" Magnus breathed, looking at Alec at last, the curling white and gold sparks dancing over his skin just as much as they were dancing over Magnus's. 

"First things first." Alec told him, smiling. "Let's finish this." 

Asmodeus had summoned a ball of power, setting it off like an explosion with himself as the epicentre, and as Clary, Lorenzo, and Isabelle were thrown off their feet, Magnus strode angrily forwards, with Alec's Seraph dagger glowing in his hand. 

The shock was priceless as Asmodeus saw his son wielding a weapon of the angels with impunity, and Alec felt a vicious curl of pride that they had managed to be so underestimated. 

"I'm your father! You will obey me!" 

Magnus batted away Asmodeus's attempt at defense as if he were swatting a fly, and didn't break stride for a moment, thrusting the dagger into Asmodeus's chest to the hilt and letting his powers roil out of him in a rage of fire. "No, I won't." 

Alec caught Magnus, pulling him in tight, as the magic turned Asmodeus to ash and seemed to spread into the ground on which he'd stood. "What's happening?" Alec asked, and then nearly screamed at the sudden rush of power that began to burn its way through him--through them, as the power of the King of Edom, and all the power of Edom herself pushed into Magnus, and overflowed into their bond. 

"Alec!" Jace screamed, but it sounded farther away than it ought to. Alec and Magnus crumpled, still holding each other, and Alec dimly hoped that the others had come with a plan on getting home, because he could tell that Edom was acting on her new King's will, unconscious or not, and beginning to collapse around them. 

Isabelle's face was the last thing that Alec saw before the swamping hold of the power knocked him out for the pain. "Hold on, hermano!" 

~

There were hangovers, and then there was absorbing the powers of a Greater Demon and a Hell dimension after your Nephilim fiancé essentially overloaded you on angelic power. 

Magnus was fairly sure that there was a long list of things long-dead that would taste better than the inside of his mouth. But he could feel Alexander in his arms, and the uncomfortable give of an infirmary bed beneath them, and knew that their friends had managed to get them home at least. 

"Ow." Alec groaned into Magnus's chest, not bothering at all to try to move. 

"Seriously, what the fuck happened?" Magnus asked, voice sounding like screws in a blender. 

"Working theory," Catarina said from the infirmary doorway, voice pitched perfectly to send hot pokers through both their headaches, "is that when Alec first shared his strength with you, it left open a door. Just a crack. And when Alec brought your powers back? Well, your magic likes him, Magnus, and so it started pushing that door open further." 

"And then Alec took the proverbial door off its hinges in Edom." Magnus sighed, then groaned. 

"From what Isabelle and Jace managed to help me piece together, yes." 

"Is everyone okay?" Alec asked muzzily. His weight shifted slightly, as if he was about to try to surface from Magnus's chest, but he immediately gave that up as a bad job, and just let himself hide.

Magnus wasn't sure if it was a calculated move on Alec's part, sounding as adorable as he did, but it worked a treat, certainly: Catarina's voice turned warm and fond, and when she sank into the chair by the bed, she reached over to ruffle Magnus's hair fondly, the same way she did with Madzie. "Yes, you two were in the worst shape. Mixing angelic and demonic magic like you did...will come with consequences, I expect. Worse, even, than you two nearly dying for the sheer amount of power shared between you." 

"How...Clary's new rune?" Alec was slurring slightly, and when Magnus focused on the strange connection between them, he could feel how tired Alec was, feel him sliding towards unconsciousness once more. 

"A rune that works on Downworlders. Shares powers. You should be thankful that it was your sister you were dealing with at vampire speed, not Clary. They've been experimenting since you got back, and for as cute as she is, Clary should not have access to that. 

"I saw...Clary using Lorenzo's magic?" Magnus asked, blinking in confusion. 

"Yes. I would have been the warlock to go with everyone, but Isabelle refused to risk me when it would leave Madzie alone. Lorenzo went in my place, with a little...convincing." 

"That would mean Jace and Meliorn were sharing powers." Alec mused before Magnus could ask about the convincing required, sounding like he was a hair away from giggling. 

"Yes. And one of the side-effects of that was that Jace couldn't lie so long as they were tied." 

"Are these two lazy-bones awake?" Isabelle asked fondly from the doorway. 

"Relatively." Magnus answered. "Your brother is _just_ hanging on." 

Isabelle laughed openly at him, sitting on the end of the bed. "He's not arguing with you, so he may not actually be awake at all." 

Alec tried to growl, Magnus assumed, but it came out more as some strange snuffling sound. He wrapped his arms more tightly around his Shadowhunter, and looked to Catarina again, "You said there would be consequences to Alec and I mixing demonic and angelic magic." 

"It doesn't appear to be hurting either of you." Catarina told him, raising a staying hand, "It's actually the steadiest connection I've ever seen. You know we don't share energy like you did then, Magnus, because accidents tend to happen when we do. But I have a feeling Alec's been using a little of your magic for a long time now, and it's allowed you both some leeway in handling whatever will come of this." Alec nodded confirmation into Magnus's chest, and Isabelle huffed a laugh. "You two have an entirely unique bond. And while there was push-back for Clary using the Alliance rune that she came up with for the others, I can't say what anything or anyone will make of this." 

"What can I get you two right now? Not to take the wind from your sails, but until you've recovered from the overload, it's not a good idea for you to try to use your magic right now." Isabelle told them, squeezing Magnus's ankle affectionately. 

"Alec, I'm going to have to insist that you have some water and try to have some food before we let you go back to sleep." Catarina's voice edged towards sternly parental, and Alec groaned but nodded his agreement. 

Catarina and Isabelle left them to forage for supplies, and Magnus found himself petting through Alec's tumult of hair. "Are you really okay?" Magnus asked, idly testing the bond even as he did, and finding that Alec just felt sore and tired, the same way he did. 

"I feel like I've been hit by a Behemoth demon, but yes, I'm okay." Alec replied, "Are you okay? You used my Seraph blade, and it didn't hurt you, right?" 

"No, it didn't." Magnus murmured, looking at his hand as if expecting to now see where he should have been burned. 

Alec took a shaking breath, then shifted so that he could look at Magnus properly. "I'm sorry...that you were the one to kill him." 

The corner of Magnus's mouth ticked up for the barest of moments, "I seem to recall hearing your sister claim me as family. When it comes down to it, I can't feel...guilty or sad, for having killed him, because it meant keeping my family safe." 

Alec pressed his lips to Magnus's heart, easing back down again. "What happened, that we were so suddenly in Edom?" 

"I don't know how _you_ ended up there," Magnus sighed with a curl of amusement, "but Lilith was gathering enough power to either punch her way into this world, or make her final stand. I couldn't let her tear open the fabric between this world and Edom, so I insisted that Asmodeus and I strike while she still appeared to be preparing. I tried to send you a fire-message, but I'm guessing that didn't reach you." 

"The ring is how I ended up there." Alec murmured. "If the working theory is right, and your magic was trying to...'open the door', I think the ring was how it was going about it." 

Magnus hummed, smiling to himself when his thumb tested along his own ring finger and found his ring there. More than likely, Catarina had been in one of her rare sentimental moods when they got back, and had taken it from the chain Magnus had been wearing it on to put it back where it was meant to be. 

"I don't want to think about what fallout there could be..." 

"But you don't want to be unprepared, either." Magnus sighed in agreement. 

"How long do you think the odds are that in sharing powers, I might be immortal finally? That I won't ever have to leave you again?" 

Magnus flinched, looking down at Alec in his arms. It was only after he hadn't responded for a few minutes that Alec looked up at him, brow furrowed. "What do you mean, 'finally', Alexander?"

"I've been looking for a way...I was looking for a way, before you gave your powers up for Jace. I've never wished you were a mundane, Magnus. I want forever with you." 

"No--" Magnus choked, and Alec shifted in his arms, spreading out until Magnus found that he was the one being held more than he was holding Alec anymore. 

"Yes. I know...how much pain it has put you through. But I also know that Nephilim only really love once, and you are it for me, Magnus. I will face down losing Jace and Isabelle and Max; I'll face down whatever it takes, if it means that _I_ will not be one of the losses you have to bear." 

The tears coursed from Magnus's eyes, and Alec tilted his face towards him, kissing the tears away with barely-there touches. 

"I love you, Magnus." Alec breathed, long fingers playing over the line of Magnus's jaw. "A forever with you won't be nearly enough time for me."

**Author's Note:**

> Yes, it is still Katka's fault. 
> 
> Also, for anyone curious: no, I have no bloody clue what the canon is exactly, I've just watched Malec clips on Youtube to the point whereupon I am ashamed of myself.


End file.
